How can you be the biggest loser if you win?
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Only June and already folks are talking about the Oscars. Early favorite for best actor is Abdul Kader Kieta, forward for the Ivory Coast's soccer team.

Tiger Woods thought he'd be a shoo-in as leading man. Now, it looks like he'll have to settle for a (child) supporting role.
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During WWII, General Anthony "Latin" Mott was given his nickname after a visit to the European theater. Hearing that the allies' cache of bullets was dangerously low, he'd left the following orders for the supply sergeant. Ammo: amass. - A. Mott

And then there was Vincent Spinelli, an Italian soldier on leave at a whorehouse in Paris when the city was liberated. The GI's who found him gave him the name, "Caesar," after Vinnie's Vichy V.D.
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An article in our paper says that orthopedic surgeons are often too eager to give artificial joints to people with leg pain. Call it a knee-jerk reaction.
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Speaking of jerks... Did you see the pictures of BP chief Tony Hayward watching his yacht race off English waters? It's hard to describe the look on his face, but slippery, oily, and slimy come to mind.

And the Chairman of BP is no prize either, describing the folks whose livelihoods have been destroyed by the oil leak as, "the small people." Well, maybe they do look small when you only view them from 30,000 feet up.

At first, I was even trying to defend the guy. I thought it was a language problem, that maybe he'd meant to say something besides small. So I looked up some synonyms he might have used: "petty, trivial, insignificant..." I take it back. He's a jerk.
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My brother-in-law and his wife give their kids stickers for good behavior. Last week, my nephew earned a "sharing" sticker and had just picked out the one he wanted when his sister piped up that she, too, wanted the same sticker. Which precipitated a fight over the sharing sticker. My brother-in-law says it's too bad the kids have no sense of irony.